Welcome to Connor’s Cozy Corner, where I, Connor Lewis, take a look at that chip on your shoulder and suggest what kind of dip would go well with it. It’s not always easy to ask for advice from a loved one, and there may be some bias, so I decided to start a completely objective advice column for real problems from real people. Keep in mind that I am a student just like you, so please take everything with a grain of salt, and don’t forget to think for yourself.
I want to become an artist, but because my older sister is also going into an art career and currently not doing well, my parents insist that I can’t. Art is my passion, and it’s unfair that they’re limiting me like this. Any advice??
Dear Aspiring Artist,
With any big decision, it’s very important to take note of all the possible outcomes. Your parents want to protect you and make sure you’ll be safe after they are gone. They also don’t sound closed minded, considering they allowed your sister to pursue the same thing. Sadly, the misfortunes of your sister don’t seem to be helping your parents’ open minds. The best thing to do is drown them with plans and facts. Show them that this is genuinely what you want to do for the rest of your life and you have a way of achieving it and making money. Find a way to separate yourself from your sister and tell them why you deserve to be an artist.
Hi Connor, I’m a girl at Northwood who really likes this boy. We’ve hooked up a few times so I think he likes me. But he’s embarrassed to tell anyone we are together. Why do you think he doesn’t want to tell people about us? Should I be concerned?
Dear He’s Just Not That Into You,
There are 1,400 people in Northwood High School alone. Please do yourself a favor and find someone else. A relationship is a two-person job, and it sounds like he’s not taking his shift. You should never have someone feel embarrassed to be with you. Get someone who wants to rent out a billboard with your face on it that says, “I’m dating her!!!” That may be a little extreme, but you know what I mean. Think about how he makes you feel, not just when hooking up, but afterwards. He should not make you think that you’re too embarrassing to be with, and he obviously has to figure things out for himself and how he treats people. So I’m asking you to please give yourself this gift: cut him out of your life and be comfortable in your newly found independence. You are strong and beautiful and deserve to find happiness. Love yourself.
What should I eat for lunch?
Dear Starved Student,
Well, you haven’t given me any allergy information or if you’d have any preference for a vegetarian meal, so I’ll just tell you what I’d have. First, start with a little something light to delight the palate, maybe some bruschetta with tomato and basil, commonly described as “summer on toast.” Next I’d start by making a browned butter lime sauce by melting butter in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Cook this mixture, whisking constantly, until the foam subsides and the butter begins to turn a golden brown—it should take about three minutes. Stir in garlic, honey and lime juice, salt and pepper, to taste. Next I’d get some freshly caught salmon straight from the market and gut and descale it—you must be heartless. Then drizzle the glaze on the plump meat for it to soak in. Next place it into an oven that has been preheated to 400 degrees, let cook for 8-10 minutes and enjoy!
My best friend has been telling people she secretly hates me. I want to confront her but I am scared. Help me pls??!?!!
Dear Caesar,
You have been stabbed in the back. The best thing to do is to not be confrontational; no one likes to be yelled at (even if they deserve it). It’s best to do it in person—I know it’s harder that way, but it’s for the best—so nothing is misinterpreted. People are generally more empathetic in real life. Don’t tip toe; ask confidently and precisely if what you have been hearing is true. Whatever the answer is, remain calm and remember to breathe. High school is a long four years, and in that time you will lose and gain people, and you have to roll with the punches. To quote Dita Von Teese, a famous actress and model, “You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches.”
